Kouluturvaa asked our helpline psychologists and psychotherapists 10 fundamental questions about school bullying. We hope the answers are helpful in recognising school bullying and helping the ones who are being bullied at school.
q 1. How can parents tell if their child is being bullied at school at school? 2. How can a teacher recognise school bullying? – The teacher can ask the student about it in private. 3. How should the parents talk to their child who is being bullied at school? 4. What does a child who’s being bullied at school feel and go through? 5. How can the school help a student who’s being bullied? – The person who is being bullied should find a confidant to talk to and receive support from. 6. Where to seek help when you are being bullied at school? 7. How to proceed when the school doesn’t acknowledge the school bullying? 8. Where can the person who was bullied receive help in later life, as an adult for example? 9. How can fellow students help prevent school bullying? 10. How to cope with school bullying?
– Changes in behaviour can be signs of school bullying.
– The child may hide that they’re being bullied at school for a long time.
– The child can often deny being bullied at school and avoid the topic.
– The child may downplay the school bullying, be indifferent or avoid discussing school.
– Restlessness, unhappiness, irritation, and even aggressiveness may be signs of school bullying.
– Fears relating to school and unwillingness to go to school may also be signs of school bullying.
– Loss of motivation and underperforming are signs of school bullying.
– The child can experience unexplainable nausea, headaches, stomachaches, headaches, sleep disturbances, changes in appetite etc.
– The child may become disinterested in themselves and their wellbeing.
– The child may become lost in their thoughts and assume no one cares or understands.
– The parents should also ask what help would their child want if they were being bullied at school. They should ask for the child’s opinion on school bullying, and if it’s a problem in their school. They can also ask what a regular school day is like for their child.
– The best way is to ask the child about it.
– Among other things, signs of a complicated situation are:
– Children may also be afraid of the teacher contacting their parents and them being angry at their child for having problems.
– The teacher should trust their intuition. They should have an anonymous quiz in class about the occurrence of bullying.
– The school should notice bullying and acknowledge it. Every school should have an action plan against school bullying.
– Classrooms and other public spaces in school should have visible information about school bullying being a crime.
– They need to offer support and help their child.
– It is very important to discuss how the child realised they were being bullied and explain the situation.
– They should emphasise that they support their child.
-Their role is to ask questions and listen. They should not overreact or place blame. A too strong of a reaction will cause the child to shut down fearing the consequences.
– They should tell the child that school bullying is a crime, they were mistreated, and the situation is being resolved.
– It should be emphasised that the bullying is not the child’s fault.
– They should have a discussion with their child about discuss what happens between people and how they influence each other. For example: foolishness amplifies in a group of people, the group will usually influence one person to act in a way the leader or the majority decide. The peer pressure in the group is too strong to withstand, because exclusion from the group is very traumatic and usually ends in being bullied at school.
– The child shouldn’t be alone.
– They feel shame, guilt and fear.
– They feel excluded and lonely.
– They may feel anger in unfair situations due to their inability to defend themselves.
– They wonder why they’re being bullied at school.
– The child is scared they’re not important and are disliked by others. A low self esteem and a ruined self-image.
– They can be afraid they won’t be believed if they discuss it at home and at school.
– A sense of togetherness is vital for the child from a developmental standpoint. The child is feeling abandoned.
– They will wonder if there’s actually something wrong with them.
– The school understand the nature of school bullying;
– Their class and the school should support and encourage the student. The whole school plays a part in preventing school bullying on both formal and informal levels.
– Access to a psychologist, a school administrator, and a healthcare worker.
– The student board should discuss school bullying and take further actions.
– The whole school culture should promote teamwork and communication. The school defines being sociable as everyone interacting with everyone. This will make it harder to form cliques, pairs and secret groups. The people who are being bullied will receive support from many sources and the groups bullying others will disassemble.
– The teacher needs to interfere systematically in cases of school bullying.
– Especially should learn and teach emotional skills, recognising feelings and naming them.
– Home and school are the first places to seek help.
– Local family and youth counselling centers.
– Local youth support.
– Health center counselling services.
– The Finnish Student Health Services provide psychologist guidance to university and college students.
– Adults can get counselling for being bullied in earlier life from their local occupational health centre.
– Private counselling and therapy services are also an option.
– The sooner you seek help, the faster you’ll start feeling better.
– It is very important for the parents and the school to work together to find a common language.
– The teachers, other school personnel, and classmates all have a responsibility to handle situations related to bullying. The school is responsible for maintaining safety and peace.
– It is important to investigate the matter.
– If the situation can’t be resolved despite efforts, the school has to protect the people being bullied in any way they can. When a younger child is being bullied, there should be an adult accompanying them outside the school.
– The child has to be taught ways to handle the situation: distance yourself from the situation, stay near the monitor teacher, join a different group, tell your teacher.
– The school can request outside help if there isn’t enough evidence.
– School bullying can have lasting effects on mental health.
– People who have been bullied at school can be agitated by intensified feelings of unfairness, shame and inequality which can impact their ability to work. This is a good time to seek professional help. A wound needs to be cleaned before it can start to heal.
– Access to a psychologist and a school administrator.
– Family advisories offer services to pupils, teens and families.
– Private practices offering counselling, psychologist, and psychotherapy services.
– The Finnish Student Health Services provide psychologist guidance to university and college students and adults can get counselling from their local occupational health centre.
– Some healthcare centres offer psychiatric nursing and psychologist services.
– Many self-help based counselling and guidance services are offered via phone for adults.
– Online therapy and counselling, for example www.mielenterveystalo.fi
– Anti-bullying principles constantly applied in class. One for all, all for one.
– No one is excluded, everyone is invited along and everyone interacts with everyone.
– A few students are chosen every week whose responsibility is to supervise that no one is being bullied.
– Teamwork skills help prevent school bullying. The members in groups switch places after a certain period of time so that everyone learns to work with everyone and develop their skills.
– It is important to bring up the topic of bullying. Discussion is vital.
– The realisation that others understand and you are not alone with your experiences lessens shame and guilt. People believe you and take you seriously be visible and audible.
– Professionals, whose job it is to help deal with psychological problems, also help to cope.
– Many adults have stories about dealing with bullying to inspire others. We don’t need to remember the negative, don’t have to stay angry, forgive, and learn to respect ourselves and others regardless of the good and bad sides.
– Friends and support groups for people in similar situations are helpful.
– Teenagers are able to cope with the help of adults and people in similar situations. Parents are the ones helping the most. The understanding, support and clear opinion that the situation is being dealt with, are priority number one.
– As teenagers it is especially important to belong to a group and for that reason their support is essential for the development of their self esteem.
– It is necessary for elementary students to receive support from an adult to handle the situation and understand things. The situation has to be explained very thoroughly whilst taking into account their ability to comprehend things. Making friends and adult supervision are the best ways to cope. The adult needs to assure the child they’re taking the situation seriously, listening to them, and working on resolving it.
1. How can parents tell if their child is being bullied at school at school?
2. How can a teacher recognise school bullying?
– The teacher can ask the student about it in private.
3. How should the parents talk to their child who is being bullied at school?
4. What does a child who’s being bullied at school feel and go through?
5. How can the school help a student who’s being bullied?
– The person who is being bullied should find a confidant to talk to and receive support from.
6. Where to seek help when you are being bullied at school?
7. How to proceed when the school doesn’t acknowledge the school bullying?
8. Where can the person who was bullied receive help in later life, as an adult for example?
9. How can fellow students help prevent school bullying?
10. How to cope with school bullying?